How Could You?

So remember last week? When I blogged about my second day of training? And how pumped I was about getting super fit with the horses and the whole Roman empire? Well, I just learned a couple of new things about my body.

Number 1, my body doesn’t do Gregorian calendars. Instead, it had manipulated me with into thinking that IT WAS OK NOT TO EXERCISE FOR A WEEK, created a deceitful calendar behind my back, and care freely pronounced yesterday as the third day of training when it should have been my eight (which isn’t any much better, I know). It wasn’t until I checked my blog had I known that the past week was completely omitted out from my life. Just like that. Seven days deleted from my life. Just like that. And with only three days left of training, believe me, I too, am truly baffled by this. Truly.

Fact number 2, as of yesterday, my body is allergic to sports. My definition of sports is basically anything that involves sweating. And yesterday, I sweated like I’ve never sweated before. I was drenched. Soaked. It wasn’t until I was crawling half way up the hill that I concluded, no man, no being, no living thing will ever beat me at sweating. In fact, even the waterfalls and its grandmas can’t challenge me. I am the ultimate warrior, CHAMPION OF SWEAT. Ok, so I don’t know why I just phrased something so disgusting with full passion, pride, and honor. But it’s true. And by the way, I’m allergic to sports you see. So it’s ok.

Finally, number 3. It has come to attention that I am held hostage against my will. It took me a while, but I realize now that I am trapped in a ruthless terrorism environment. At first I assumed that I was just imagining things, that I needed more sleep than the usual 8 hours because I’m still a growing adult, that all those hours and hours of watching television was a normal therapeutic treatment called eye exercise, and that my body actually required that fifth scoop of rice as nourishment. I know now that my body is actually taking over me. Subconsciously.

So all those insane spontaneous reflexes weren’t mine to begin with. It was my body. Even that time when I hurled the remote control towards the door because I was too lazy to walk 3 meters just to close the door. Or yesterday, when my legs became numbed and paralyzed, leaving me no choice but to square dance myself down the hill with a substitute leg. It wasn’t me. Or even when I kicked a pile of rubbish under the bed because…well, ok that was me. But all those other stuff, it was totally my body’s doing. That traitor.

So to my body I say, how could you ?! We were like family. I bathed you, I fed you, I clothed you. I practically raised you like my own. And you betrayed me. Even right at this moment, you’re making me think about food again. Ohhh…you disgust me. What’s that you say? No need to blog with pictures? Oh no no no, not this time. I’ll show you who’s boss. You don’t tell me what to do, I TELL YOU WHAT TO DO. And I say we post pictures. Comprendo? Good. But right after we go grab a cookie. Come along now…

This top I’m wearing started the day being a lovely dark blue tone and ended the day with a slightly darker shade of disgusting sweat.

We diverted on an alternate way back, passing by a sign that clearly wrote “Pathway Not Encouraged To Take”. But it turned out to be a great place to shoot.

I had…I mean my body had troubles lifting itself onto higher grounds so Raja found a stick, broke off its shoots, re-sized it to my height and blessed me with an awesome third leg. My substitute leg. I love.

Unfortunately I had to leave it behind because what came from the woods belongs back in the woods.